Many of us out there have relationships, whether it be wife, girlfriend, or like me fiance. And if your reading this blog I also assume you have a relationship, a mistress if you will, in golf. Now some times these relationships clash. Just play as a single once and a while and the conversation can’t help but turn to how the wife either despises or appreciates your time away on the course. Heck I would hope some of you even use golf as an activity to do together. I don’t, but that doesn’t matter. That’s because that is not the relationship I want to talk about. I want to talk about our relationships with the game, the course, and the experiences we have when the clubs come out of the garage.
This post is coming from a fantastic experience I had this weekend playing some of the more awful golf I have ever played, at least for 27 holes that is. I spent the weekend playing at a golf course called Sandpiper in Santa Barbara, CA. It’s right on the coast and could be considered a poor mans Pebble if you will. It was a spectacular setting to say the least. It was also a stern test of golf. The greens were as punitive as any I have played when the ball is above the hole. You could breathe a ball 40 ft downhill on some of these greens. In fact, I even had a putt roll back a 1/4 inch while in my stroke on one hole.
So on to my point with this post… How is your relationship with golf? How do you approach the game? This weekend I choose to appreciate the surroundings, the beauty, the smell of the ocean, and the fact that I got to spend all weekend outdoors in perfect weather. The bad shots didn’t bother me so much. Of course I mumbled an occasional swearword or two, but for the most part you couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. Even when I posted a 12. Putting myself in last place with my first round score, the thing that bothered me the most that day was that my camera broke right before we got to some of the prettiest holes. I had fun, and did it playing some of my worst golf ever. Could you have done the same?
I have crossed paths with many different golfers over the years, and it seems that there are many different types. Is your relationship with golf a love/hate relationship? Do you love the game when you play well and hate it when you don’t. Do you get angry? Toss clubs? Its ok if you do, we have watched the #1 player in the world do it a bunch. Or do you love the game unconditionally? Does it comfort you to just get outside on the green grass after a hard day? I mean there aren’t many sports you can play where you get to hang outside in the sun and grass for 4 hours with no stadium to block the views and beauty of nature. That would be a pleasurable experience for many, yet just this weekend I had some one ask me “Why do we torture ourselves with this game?” That is a pretty strong statement when you think about it, but I am sure we have all asked ourselves a similar question once or twice.
This is something I have been working on a lot lately. I love to golf. I love to compete… at anything. Want to race to that flagpole? Its on. So how can I be upset when I am doing two things I love. I can’t. Well actually I can, but I won’t. Not anymore. Golf is challenge. Being really good at this sport is hard. But that’s not where the rewards come from. Ask David Duval. Achieve your goals and all you are left with is the question “whats next?” The time that should make you the happiest in any relationship is the time you are together. That can be the range, the course, or the putting green. And I make the choice to do those things, because I do love golf. Its not the score, or any trophy’s and accolades, its the small things like when you walk out and smell the fresh cut grass. Or when you finish up at dusk and your hitting that last shot in the dark. Or when your privileged enough to spend a weekend on an ocean course like I did this weekend. These are the things I take home with me from the course. Are you doing the same? Or does a bad round send you home grumpy? Does it eat at you when don’t play your best? If so, maybe its time for some relationship counseling with this sport or hobby we are committed to.
Mike, I think you’ve hit the nail on the head for so many of us golfers. For me personally, I used to play a lot of competitive golf in my younger years and it wasn’t always that enjoyable. put too much pressure on myself and didn’t enjoy my surroundings.
Now it can be a different experience. Just getting out on the course for me now is a treat. Being able to play with my buddies and enjoy some laughs and friendly jabbing. That’s not to say I don’t want to or expect to play well. There are just a lot less thrown clubs and F-bombs!
this is a great post. I think it can be hard for people, such as yourself, to take a step back from the game and the score and just enjoy the fact they are playing. Hopefully this will help others who do get caught up in the game realize that sometimes you just have to enjoy what you are doing in the moment and not take it so seriously.
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